This morning my mum was reading out an article from the local paper and the statement “this event ripped the fake facade off the new and improved……” and I got a dose of the seriously grumpies about it.

You can NOT have something that is both NEW and IMPROVED they are mutually exclusive descriptive words!

  • New – something that has not existed before
  • Improved – to fix or make better something that already exists

Yes I know being Autistic means my brain processes information differently and I tend to take written or verbal information literally.  This means I get very frustrated with conflicting information presented together like at a laboratory I work for who had 2 signs on a door directly under each other.

  • FIRE DOOR KEEP CLOSED AT ALL TIMES
  • OPEN SLOWLY AS OTHERS MAY BE ON OTHER SIDE

If the door is to be kept closed at all times why would you need instructions on opening it?

I have always had problems with language both written and verbal.  I do not understand why we have multiple ways to spell words.  Take for instance there, their or they’re why can’t we just use one and put the frigging thing in context to the sentence it’s used in and it’ll make sense.  I also don’t understand why people state the obvious like a sign I once saw outside a strip club that said “Live Girls Dancing”, what’s the alternative dead girls dancing…….

Along with languistical challenges I suffer what is politely referred to as “social communication difficulties”, which is a really nice way of saying I’m mostly rude and insensitive according to modern social manners of the places colonised by England.  I find people who waffle on and on and on in response to a question that requires a Yes, No  or short response really irritating.

I find it equally as frustrating when people evidently want or need something from me and instead of just bluntly asking me for it they give this whole elaborate back story and hint at whatever it is they want/need without directly asking for it.  They  then get upset with me because I don’t give the required response they are expecting because I still have no idea what they want/need.  I’m not sure if it’s just considered socially unacceptable to bluntly ask for something you want or need or if a large proportion of people are passive/aggressive but it drives me bonkers.  I’m not beyond either simply walking off half way through their waffling saga or butting in and say “Is there a point to this waffling saga and if there is would you hurry up and get to it”, both of which are apparently rude.

I’m really curious if people on the Autism Spectrum from places not colonised by England and there for not required to adhere to the idiotic rules of English Language and Socially Acceptable Behaviour have the same issues?  I know from visiting my sister in Singapore that in her husbands culture (Hokkien) asking direct questions like “how much did that dress cost” is not considered at all rude.  For that matter what do cultures that don’t use Diagnostic Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders version 5 (DSM-V) use to classify someone as being Autistic or Aspergers?  Do they even have Autism or Aspergers as a recognised diagnosis?

 

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